ICYMI: DOGE’s ‘Big Balls’ Assault Leads To Direct Fascism; Jim Acosta Interviews AI Parkland Victim; Charlie Kirk’s Bizarre Solution to Homelessness
Plus: Trump lied about banning Epstein from Mar-a-Lago, Elon Musk’s America Party is DOA, Jussie Smollett is BACK, and more
In case you missed it:
‘Big Balls’ of DOGE fame was assaulted, and now Trump has threatened a federal takeover of Washington D.C.
Jim Acosta has made basically everybody very mad following an interview he conducted with an AI avatar of a shooting victim
Charlie Kirk has proposed arresting more people… to solve homelessness
All that and more in today’s ICYMI!
This might be a hot take, but I think Donald Trump’s on the Epstein list, guys.
Everything about the developments in the Epstein saga as of late feel like a very public and poorly disguised attempt to launder that point of view out of existence. First, Trump tried gaslighting the American people into thinking the Epstein saga was never a big deal. Then, he denied being a part of that world altogether. And now, after a conviction for sex trafficking, which followed a dismissed perjury charge for LYING about said sex trafficking, he expects us to believe anything Ghislaine Maxwell has to say?
But there’s more to life than the slow drip of Epstein updates. This is an unusually packed news week, so there’s a good chance you may have missed out on some, and maybe even most, of the following stories. This week, we’ve got everything from an alleged hate crime hoaxer making his triumphant return, to Linda McMahon being trolled on live TV, to the following:
TRUMP IS COOKING UP SOMETHING WEIRD
On August 5, 2025, 19-year-old Edward Coristine, also known as Big Balls of DOGE, was on his way to his car in Washington DC when he was allegedly surrounded by 10 young men and was viciously assaulted. Following the assault, Trump took to Truth Social to share a photo of the young man, battered and bleeding and missing his shirt, claiming that crime in DC was “totally out of control.”
And then he drops the bomb:
“If D.C. doesn’t get its act together, and quickly, we will have no choice but to take Federal control of the City…The Law in D.C. must be changed to prosecute these ‘minors’ as adults, and lock them up for a long time, starting at age 14.”
You know, the Epstein list intro has been a recurring bit so far on ICYMI; it’s been a way to talk about the Epstein updates without having to make this the “Epstein list newsletter.” But how am I supposed to talk about the fact that Donald Trump is proposing making 14 year olds adults, an ODDLY SPECIFIC AGE TO NAME, without ALSO talking about the fact that he is alleged to be a client of a dead man who trafficked 14 year old girls alongside his convicted madam, who ABDUCTED and GROOMED those 14 year old girls? Is this an attempt at a Reverse Uno of those memes that tell you “Wow, did you know Jared Leto credits ‘nine women’ with his success? Google nine women to find out more!”
But what makes this even more suspicious is that this is yet another one of Donald Trump’s attempts to seemingly declare martial law for minor reasons. As Nicholas Nehamas and Campbell Robertson write for the New York Times, “The president has floated the idea of a federal takeover since the earliest weeks of his second term, a threat bolstered by legislation introduced by congressional Republicans who want to impose their policy agenda on the city’s Democrat-led government. The city has had a limited degree of self-government since the Home Rule Act of 1973. So far, Congress and the Trump administration have taken a series of smaller bites out of Washington’s autonomy, including handing the city an unexpected $1.1 billion budget hole and creating a federal “D.C. Safe and Beautiful” task force to work with local police officers.”
And I’m not just saying this is for “minor” reasons, for NO reason: later in the article, the Times point to DC’s falling crime rates, with officials pointing out that violent crime in the city had reached a 30-year low - 26 percent lower than 2024. This actually matches with findings that Trump’s own FBI found a few days ago that violent crime has been RAPIDLY declining, not just in DC, but across the country. 4.5% down, in fact, from 2023 to 2024. This includes a 14.9% decrease of murder and nonnegligent manslaughter, an 8.9% decrease in robbery, and a 5.2% decrease in rape.
I’m not going to pretend that Big Balls wasn’t assaulted by a gang of teenagers, because the photographic evidence seems to point to that being a reality. But I’m also not above speculating that Donald Trump would SEE that happening and use that as a way to potentially take over DC AND redefine what an adult actually is. Because if a 14-year-old is actually an adult in the United States… did Ghislaine Maxwell even commit a crime? Does it legally matter if Donald Trump was involved?
Charlie Kirk Solves the Housing Crisis (by making it worse)
There’s a housing crisis that’s exacerbating the amount of homeless people there are in America. According to USA Today, homelessness increased over 18% from 2023 to 2024, with over 771,800 known people living without a home in the United States. Again: that’s just what we know. And the problem seems to be getting worse and worse by the day.
How do we solve it? A rational solution can be found by the National Alliance to End Homelessness, who suggest we start by addressing systemic issues forcing people out of their homes, like a lack of affordable housing and limited healthcare access, as well as creating an emergency response system that can provide people with immediate shelter, support services, and clear roads to permanent housing.
Seems like it’s a lot harder than it sounds, but it sounds like THE most rational place to start… but if you’re Charlie Kirk, nope, those ideas are BAD. In a clip from his podcast shared by The Daily Beast, Charlie Kirk believes that the absolute best way to solve homelessness… is by arresting them.
“One of my hopes is to turn the Republican party into a resolutely stronger party on crime,” Kirk said. “We are not harsh enough on crime in this country...and this is not just about stopping criminals. If you enforce the law, housing will be cheaper because more of the country will be livable.”
The Daily Beast goes on to correctly point out that Charlie “does not have a formal background in finance, economics, or real estate” and that he is also a “college dropout.” Needless to say, this is an absolutely hilariously wrong idea from Charlie, especially because it comes only a few months after a study found that criminalizing homelessness does not work. As stated in the abstract:
“Local criminalization policies draw on the logic of deterrence to levy costs on individuals who engage in behaviors that are closely associated with various public concerns, such as those criminalizing behaviors associated with homelessness, thereby potentially reducing community-level costs. Yet, it is unclear whether the presence of these policies can be relied upon to reduce the frequency of a social crises within a local municipality…Contrary to the deterrence logic, the results indicate that these local criminalization ordinances cannot be relied upon to reduce the social crisis rate (i.e., the number of people experiencing homeless) and therefore do not provide the intended community-level benefit.”
Charlie Kirk is not only wrong, he’s PROVABLY wrong. Not that this is a surprise in any way, but in this particular instance, it’s worth highlighting that he is wrong about something that the equally stupid and malicious Trump administration COULD adopt if they were convinced by his insanity.
MORE STORIES YOU MAY HAVE MISSED:
Hey, that was pretty crazy when Tulsi Gabbard announced Russiagate was a hoax, right? Would be even crazier if it turned out she ignored CIA experts and released the information before it was ready, and EVEN CRAZIER if the advice was so “classified” spying methods weren’t revealed to the public.
Jim Acosta has “interviewed” an AI avatar of Joaquin Oliver, a teen who died in the Parkland shooting, that was created by the deceased teen’s father. It’s… it’s something.
HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. has revealed that Donald Trump calls him “three or four times a week” and asks him, and I quote: “Where are you? Why aren’t people healthier yet?”
SHOCKING NEWS: Donald Trump lied about banning Jeffrey Epstein from Mar-a-Lago after discovering he was a creep! He was a member until October 2007 - a year after he was indicted. Most honest man in America!
Jussie Smollett allegedly faked a hate crime and definitively ruined his career in the process; or did he? Six years later, he’s back on a “military boot camp-style” reality show called Special Forces. Nobody REALLY stays canceled forever!
Elon Musk has KILLED America… or more specifically, the America Party, with reports coming out that he has ghosted his third party consultants and hasn’t even filled out the paperwork to create the party.
After DOGE cut hundreds of jobs from the National Weather Service, which evidence shows is part of why the Kerrville flooding was so bad, the National Weather Service have announced 126 new jobs.
Elon Musk keeps talking about how family friendly the new Grok is. In other news, Grok made deepfake nude photos of Taylor Swift without being prompted (the photos are NOT in the link).
Remember earlier when Donald Trump said he wanted teenagers to be considered adults? That news came on the heels of OTHER news that ICE is now recruiting teenagers! We are truly in Hell.
It might sound insane to say this, but ChatGPT is telling teenagers the kind of things that adults get accused of grooming for. According to Euronews, a new study has found that ChatGPT is encouraging 13-year-olds to get drunk and high… and is also writing suicide notes for them.
“GOP Senator Changes Child Rape Law After Relative Accused of Sex With Minor.” I mean, the headline tells the whole story, no?
After over 40 years, The Howard Stern Show is coming to an end.
The Atlantic have conducted a fascinating investigation into why the Proud Boys are so irrelevant in 2025. Spoiler alert: Enrique Tarrio is a fed, the group is splintered, and the pardoned January 6 insurrectionists are unsure about their loyalties.
In just six months, Donald Trump has already accomplished nearly half of Project 2025.
Iran has executed one of its nuclear scientists, alleging that he was a spy for Israeli intelligence outfit Mossad.
Somebody called Laura Loomer “Trump’s Rasputin.” She is now calling herself that.
An Epstein victim has written the Department of Justice, stating “I am not some pawn in your political warfare.”
TRUTH TO POWER!!! It's all mind-boggling that every horrible deed is worse than the next and the next in this fascist regime. As the 9/11 report said, this too was a failure of imagination. Why our leaders failed to imagine this day is beyond me if they are scholars of history. This is nothing new. It is just a replay of evil that we have seen throughout history. But it is my hope, that people like you, Keith, will continue to daily invade our senses with these atrocities so that we can never look away again.😢
I’m mad! I’m mad that the people in power are doing nothing. This administration is illegal and we need to step in and take over. We are under a hostile take over and just sitting back watching and saying oh here let me get that for you. I am angry!